Listings

For some reason, I don't get anything done without a list. I think it helps me stay a little more focused on what I want to accomplish.


The current lists generating:

-Packing/Cleaning
-Summer Fun
-New Zealand Prep
-No Regrets Logan



I would indulge you in my packing/cleaning list, but that's pretty self-explanatory.


But my summer fun list I will let you have a peek into:

-Go to Moab
-Have a picnic
-Fly Kites
-Go Fishing
-Go to Canyonlands
-Go to Mesa Verde
-Work Out 4x / week - Ultimate Goal: Lose 35 lbs by September 1st.
-Bowling League: Bowl 200+ games 3x this summer
-Finish 3 sewing projects
-Finish 15 books
-Grow a Garden
-Thoroughly Clean the house - My room, the shed, the boys room. We're going to go through everything, pack stuff up that isn't being used but that we want to hang onto, and get rid of everything else.
-Paint the livingroom

Start Living

That's the next thing on my list.

There's a Toby Keith song that keeps playing in my head.

It starts:

Under an old brass paper weight, is my list of things to do today.
Go to the bank and the hardware store, put a new lock on the cellar door.
I cross 'em off as I get 'em done, but when the sun is settin'
There's still more I than a few things I haven't got to yet.
Go for a walk, say a little prayer, take a deep breath of mountain air,
Put on my glove, and play some catch, it's time that I make time for that.
Wade the shore, cast a line, look up an old lost friend of mine
Sit on the porch, and give my girl a kiss,
Start living; that's the next thing on my list.
Wouldn't change the course of fate, if cuttin' the grass just had to wait,
'Cause I got more important things, like pushing my kid on a backyard swing.
I won't break my back for a million bucks I can't take to my grave,
So why put off for tomorrow, what I could get done today.
Like, Go for a walk, say a little prayer, take a deep breath of mountain air,
Put on my glove, and play some catch, it's time that I make time for that.
Wade the shore, cast a line, look up an old lost friend of mine
Sit on the porch, and give my girl a kiss,
Start living; that's the next thing on my list.
Raise a little hell, laugh 'til it hurts, put an extra five in the plate at church
Call my folks just to chat, it's time I make time for that.
Stay up late, and oversleep, show her what she means to me,
Catch up on all the things I've always missed, just start living.
That's the next thing on my list.

I love this song.

I realized, after I posted about regrets, this song really comes into play. There are so many things I don't want to look back on and say "I wish I had..." or "what if..."

So this song, will become my theme song, until I find another one.

There are so many little things about living our lives, that I think often we forget the importance.

I live in Logan, Utah, and I don't want to have to say I never have experienced it. I've been here for 4 years, and I think it's time I start living.

What do you think?

What I deserve

I went on a date tonight.

I went with my Tat, whom I love and adore.

Well, we always have good, deep conversations when we're together.


Tonight we talked about a lot of things, but one of the things we talked about is what I deserve.


We were talking about marriage, and what my FEC is going to be like.
We discussed what qualities my man will have, and how he will treat me like the most precious possession he has ever been entrusted with. When he talks about me, he will only have good things to say, and will only speak kind, loving words to me.
We talked about how his love for his Savior will be his best quality, and that love will be the center of our home.

It was strange as I spoke with Tat about this, how I never thought I deserved any of this. I never saw for myself anything that Tat said I deserved. And then I realized that he's right,

I deserve the VERY best.

Thinking

I have been thinking a lot.

Just about an array of topics.

• I have been asked out 3 times in the last 2 weeks. This is not normal behavior for boys around Tiffany. This has brought on a lot of activity in my mind.
• Kale and Valerie are having serious problems. This makes my heart hurt.
• School. I'm almost done. What am I going to do with my life in a year from now?
• New Zealand. I have an opportunity to Student Teach there next year. Excited!
• Brent, Lilly, Emma, Patricia. I get to spend a little over a week with them before they move to Germany for several years.
• Money. I need it. I don't have it. School. Paying.
• Logan. How little I've come to really appreciate this amazing place I have spent the last 4 years of my life.
• Brother Krogue. My institute teacher. Truly inspiring. Love him and what he teaches me every day.

Anyway, lots on my mind as of late. It got me thinking, (imagine that). All of these topics ALL, and I mean ALL tie back to one thing. And one thing only:

Regrets. The ones I have, the ones I don't want to have.

I realize that I don't want to live my life with regret. I don't want to do anything that would cause me to feel this HORRIBLE emotion. Ever. I've felt enough of it, that I don't want to feel it anymore.

Therefore, I've deemed my last year at Utah State as my "No Regrets" year. I've realized there's so much I want to do and see that I've neglected for 4 years. I'm in the process of creating a list of the things I really want to do next year so I don't leave Logan ever thinking "I wish I had...." or "if only...."

These are two phrases I am going to slowly remove from my vocabulary and in so doing, I hope to fill my life with joy and a deeper understanding.

On Dating and Being Dated

This subject is one of constant frustration for me. The ultimate purpose for dating is marriage. End of story.

Now I could just leave it at that. But for your sake I won't.

I never dated in high school. Nope, not one single date. Yes, I went to my senior prom with Shay Beck, but I paid for everything, and prom does not count as dating.

I thought college would somehow transform how boys saw me, and they'd be lining up at my door to sweep me off my feet. Well, I went on 4 total dates my freshman year. 2 I asked, and paid for everything, so again, I don't count those for this topic (I'll get to that in just a minute, maybe tomorrow.)

To make things simple, I don't date. I've given up on asking, and I don't get asked. That's the story.

I was asked on a date the other night. Completely out of the blue. I work with him, and I never thought of him as "dating material".

This event made me ponder what I consider "dating material". I think I always imagined myself with some handsome, voiced, outgoing, talented man.

The boy from work isn't necessarily these things. He's as nice as can be, but awkward, balding, shy.

I realized how horrible I am. I never once stopped to consider his character. What his true personality is (you can only gauge that so much through work). And I realized that I am not one to judge, any of that.

In all honesty, I should just be grateful that a boy even asked me out. Really. Not that I'm turned off by his appearance, I'm not, he's a cute awkward boy, but I realized what I was looking for in a husband wasn't the right qualities. I was looking for the superficial attributes that won't help me grow as a strong daughter of God.

Now, I don't know what we're going to do on said date I've been asked on. I don't even really know this gentleman very well, but I can say this: I don't know anything about my FEC. I don't know what he looks like, what his profession is, or when we'll meet. I do know however, I have to keep an open mind. I'd rather be loved and adored by someone who may not be "model material" (stupid Tiffany), than be nothing more than arm candy for a man who is.

Happy Happy Easter

May I be truly grateful today for the reason I am alive, happy and healthy. For the wonderful miracle that we celebrate on this day of the resurrection of our Lord and Savior.